Last week, almost Six weeks post the birth of my second daughter, I was able to revisit my old art projects. I posted the next in my series of hindi alphabet illustrations as well as worked on the sketchbook exchange.
Last week was also when I came across the following in a daily online magazine:
“The painter, Wayne Thiebaud, once said that “an artist has to train his responses more than other people do. He has to be as disciplined as a mathematician. Discipline is not a restriction but an aid to freedom.” Thiebaud insists that rather than being opposed to creativity, discipline provides the conduit through which creative engagement grows and develops freely.”
Oh ! I agree with the sentiment whole heartedly. I can tell you it was hard to get back to drawing after being passive for so long. It took longer to complete and I made more mistakes. I started this blog as another medium for self-expression – Started out as a mom-blog and then it converged with my drawing interests. Somewhere in between my writing lost it’s thrust and the blog went ignored for a very long period . Now, try as I may , I am yet to get back to my rhythm of posting regularly here. What my creative force still lacks is discipline. I have written about my struggle with disciplined creativity before but parenting two kids takes it to a whole new level.
Life with an infant is unpredictable. The daily routine I had going is not followed all the time. Depending on the baby, the schedule for my elder one changes. Sleeping, story time, reading and all other pursuits have to be constantly pushed around. Now-a-days my flair for story telling is limited to hashing out ever-new stories to get my three year old to eat her food or finish her chores (yes ! I have given her some chores . Yes . at HER age!but thats a topic for some other day) . With my mother around it has been easy. I have been able to find time to rest. I can’t imagine yet how hectic life will be when she goes back to India. The very thought makes me tense.
Worry does not empty tomorrow of its sorrow. It empties today of its strength.
Even though , I am not actually creating a lot of work, I am certainly observing more and observing more intently. Creativity demands a presence of mind and a presence of Your self. My hope is that all the mental notes that I am taking for myself, I will be able to bring them to fore when I actually sit down to draw or create. I am trying to be present.
present to see
present to feel
present to process
Rather than getting disappointed at not finding enough time to do the thing, I am trying to keep the momentum going, the thoughts flowing and the process continuing.
continue to explore
continue to dream
continue to steal from time…a moment here and a moment there.